Running sucks

I've learned a lot in the last 43 years. Don't judge a book by it's cover. Be kind to others. Count to 10 when you're angry. Think before you speak. I've learned that what is here today may be gone tomorrow.

I've started running lately and at first it was just to build up my metabolism and to help me lose weight. I had no intention of running just to run, to get those endorphins, to enjoy myself when pounding the pavement. No. I don't like to run. I was doing it to get in shape, not for the love of it and certainly I don't "run just to run".

Well, then I decided to run a 5k. And it's in 3 months and now I need to get serious about this running. Every step I take, I hate. I tell myself to change my attitude because it's not helping, but it's hard to change my mindset. But whatever, I'm at least running. But I'm kind of lame about it. I know (kinda) what I need to do to prep myself. I did buy new sneakers. I did finally put music on my ipod (that I've had for a few years and never used). But I do let myself off easy when I run. I'm kind of tougher when I'm on the treadmill at the gym -- it keeps me honest. I can see how fast I'm running, how long I've been running, and how many calories I've burned. But the treadmill at the gym is kind of boring, and it's a cool, air conditioned building. To get serious, I need to run outside.

So today I worked from home, and it is a gorgeous day outside. Seriously, it's like July, not March. We are experiencing global warming in full force, folks. So at midday I thought it would be a good idea to go for a run. I didn't think about the heat or bringing water. I didn't think about the hills and loose pavement. I didn't realize that running fast would make my ipod slide off my pants. I brought my phone (in case I twisted my ankle?) and stuck it in my sports bra after I realized it wasn't working stuck in my underwear (although that had to have made anyone looking out their window laugh, as I retrieved it after it slid halfway down my bum). I did end up finishing 2 miles, but maybe half of that was running. Maybe I can think of it as "sprints" since I ran, then jogged, then walked and huffed. My face must have been beat red.

What a humbling experience. I couldn't run 2 miles straight outside on a beautiful day. For a big chunk of my life I thought I was an athlete. Even after I was no longer an athlete, I still identified as one. When I was 20 years old I was in the best shape of my life. I was a rower. I won a silver medal at Dad Vails. I had a 6 pack and legs to be proud of. It didn't occur to me to be proud of my body, because that was just who I was and it was no big deal. I had no problem staying in shape because I worked out and my metabolism was great. Now I'm an out of shape 43 year old woman who will never again laugh at someone who is huffing and puffing and taking short little jogging steps. Because that is me. And I know how hard it is to rebound.